Fair warning…I am not looking forward to RAW. I already am cringing at the fact that Kelso and Hyde are going to bring it to Jericho and the WWE Universal Champion, Kevin Owens…I just can’t wait for guys, who haven’t be relevant in years, pull a good one on WWE’s champion…WOOOOOOHOOOO!
We open with Roman Reigns coming down to the ring. That’s right, Universal Champion, oh, he is going to face off against a couple of has been actors. Our US Champion, We need to showcase him. WWE, us not wanting Roman Reigns in the main picture, means keep him off of the beginning of our show. Good news? Rusev was in the beginning with the lovely Lana. He talks, I tuned out.
Ok, so apparently we should be happy that Reigns is the only family member to win a championship that wasn’t in the company they worked for? Fuck this. To keep Reigns over we have him verbally spat with Lana? What the fuck was this? Good news is that this match seems to be happening in a Hell in the Cell, or is it. We get a brawl, woooow! So, I am officially tired of this storyline. You beat him already. You had a bullshit count out can’t we feed someone else to Reigns?
Ending saw Rusev get the upperhand…yaaaa…but NOPE, we have to have Reigns get his heat right back!
Match 1: TJ Perkins vs. Brian Kendrick
Recap: First off, WWE has now decided that this is not a championship match, after setting it up last week. What is this place being booked by a 70-year-old or something? Beginning of the match saw Perkins being too fast for Kendrick. He dives out onto Kendrick and then skins the cat right back in. Kendrick finally took over by catching Perkins, and then, putting TJ’s fingers into the turnbuckle, and stepped on his arm. Perkins takes it back over with a hurricanrana, lung buster, and then the knee bar, but we see Kendrick get the ropes. Kendrick musters up enough to hit the Sliced Bread # 2.
Ending sees Kendrick get the Captain’s Hook in deep, and TJ has to submit. Good match between the two. They didn’t do too much, and I must say if you wanted Kendrick to win, then give him the fucking belt this 50/50 shit is getting old. When you beat the champ you should win the belt it is that simple. It is impossible to take champions seriously if they continue to lose in singles matches.
Your Winner: Brian Kendrick
I am going to save you all the time with this backstage interview with Seth Rollins…He is still jealous that HHH chose Kevin over him. He is a jealous babyface. He wants to be the top heel and he isn’t so…face. Interview was fine, but doesn’t make me think of Seth as more of a face in the end.
Match 2: Braun Strowman vs. A Jobber
Recap: Squash, I am tired of this now. Thanks WWE you ruined the squash for me. Good news, Braun agrees that he is wasting his time with these matches, and wants competition starting next week.
Your Winner: Braun Strowman
Kevin Owens is out in a suit, followed in tow by Jericho and his scarf…if this is the Kelso thing I am out. At least we get some Kevin talking shit about Seth Rollins. Also, he is speaking truths, Seth Rollins lost to Kevin Owens. He has beaten him in the ring, clean-ish. He is right, he is more a face than Seth is.
Jericho tells Kevin they are going to make history and win the Tag-Team championships, while Owens is the Universal champion. Kevin says that sounds like a lot of work, and that they would have to beat the New Day just to challenge them, again a stupid fucking thing for someone to do. So stupid, in fact, that Kevin is making fun of it on their program. This brings out the New Day and I just skipped it because they have just become a bunch of pandering assholes. LMAO, Kevin points out that seven months ago the New Day jumped the shark! Oh, New Day comes back with a fat joke, good one. I didn’t find this very funny.
Match 3: Sami Zayn vs. Titus O’Neil
Recap: Oh my god, what the hell was that inset promo…? If Titus beats Zayn I am just going to shit on the rest of the show. I mean I am done if that happens. So, thank god that didn’t happen. Titus had the early advantage with the slow, shitty-ish looking offense. Sami gets the advantage and exploder suplexes Titus into the corner and hits the Helluva Kick for the 1…2…3!
Not much to say. Match was short and sweet. I think it might be time to rethink Titus and his role in wrestling.
Bullshit, haha between Cesaro and Sheamus. Mick gets mad.
Apparently, The Club has been dominating the tag team division on RAW? The same guys that just keep losing to the New Day? Those guys? WWE, how about we show, and stop telling us the story, because when you just tell, you are blatantly lying to us. We are not stupid, and we have eyes.
Match 4: The Club vs. The Golden Truth
Recap: The dominating team of the Club when 50/50 with the Golden Truth. Anderson hit zero moves, gets beat up by Truth and Goldust. Luke come sin beats up Goldust.
Anderson comes back into feed for the hot tag. Anderson gets beat up by Truth and Gallows tags in and they hit the Magic Killer. Wow, such a dominant performance.
Your Winners: The Club
So, fuck this backstage segment. Celebrities making fun of the talent, YAAAAA.
Nice, sweet segment talking about breast cancer survivors. I am not a fan of the foundation they promote, considering money could be better used towards actual research, but it was nice that they recognize these three women, and their battle with cancer.
Match 5: the New Day vs. Jeri-KO
Recap: Fuck this commentary and fuck the fact that they brought in guys that were from a show that has been off the air for like 10 years now. The storyline is that these guys are better friends than Jeri-KO, confirming that RAW is written by a 3-year-old. I forgot that these guys are on a show on Netflix, wow. Absolutely nothing to this match early.
Big E slaps the shit out of Jericho but is dropkicked by Jericho. Jericho is in the corner choking Big E with the boot, while Kevin is shadow boxing at Woods. He realizes Big E is open and hits the Cannonball in the corner. Jericho went for the super-plex but is sent face first onto the mat from the top. Crossbody by Woods could only get a 2. Kevin hit a nice DDT. This brings out Seth Rollins…wow, a distraction by way of music.
New Day takes advantage off the the fact that everyone is fucking stupid on this show. Kevin Superkicks Big E. Woods hits a plancha onto Kevin. Big splash onto Jericho. Kevin comes in as the match goes screwy. Jericho puts Woods into the Wall of Jericho but is…fucking distracted again by Seth. Midnight Hour and the 3 by The New Day. I thought this was pointless and a waste of time. I will never understand the distraction shit.
Let him come in and get the win, screw it. I am just done. The commentary didn’t help either.
Your Winners: The New Day
Backstage with Charlotte, she is the best, she is going to win…
We get a vignette of Rich Swann, hey guys he likes to have fun…man I am so into this character! Again, written by 3 year olds. Sad too, because Rich is awesome and if you just give him a story or sometime to talk, where he isn’t saying that he is just out to have fun, I think you could really go somewhere with him.
No one care segment with Seth and Stephanie, good news is that Seth didn’t take shit from Stephanie.
Match 6: Rich Swann vs. Tony Nese
Recap: So in a backstage segment Nese has more of a story than Swann has been given. Swann started off keeping a quick pace over Nese. Flipover into a dropkick by Swann. Nese off the top with a backflip into a flurry of kicks and knees. Nese taunt Swann and then starts laying the boots to Swann in the corner. Swann hits a standing, jumping hurricanrana onto Nese, who was on the turnbuckle. Nese hits a pump-handle front slam of sorts for the 1…2…3!
Match was good just nothing to write home about. The crowd is starting to get behind these guys, which is nice to see. Nese is very impressive, and Swann deserves better than the character they are giving him.
Your Winner: Tony Nese
Match 7: Cesaro and Sheamus vs. A Jobber and A Jobber
Recap: Patched up my wife’s finger…I missed nothing. Squash…same as last week
Your Winners: Cesaro and Sheamus
It’s Time for YOUR MAAAAAIIIIIIINNNNNN EVENT
Match 8: Sasha vs Charlotte © for the WWE RAW Women’s Championship
Recap: We get a commercial break to start us out. We get your typical Sasha and Charlotte back and forth. Sasha get the double knee to the chest. Sasha is caught by Charlotte, who missed a spot and threw her back into the ring.
Sasha baits Charlotte in and tries for the Bank Statement. Charlotte hits the big boot and Sasha, without having to look at the ref, kicks out at 2. Charlotte tries for the super-plex but Sasha pushes her off and hits the double knees off the top for a long 2. Sasha tries for the Back Stabber but Charlotte dumps her out of the ring and climbs to the top and completely misses the moonsault.
It was a combination of Sasha not being in position and Charlotte spinning too far to the left. On second viewing it didn’t look as bad as I initially thought. Natural Selection by Charlotte but Sasha kicks out. Sasha counters Charlotte and gets the Bank Statement. Roll through by Charlotte but Sasha keeps turning and gets it locked back in and Charlotte has to tap. Good match between the two.
A lot of similar spots that they do every time they face but they put on a hell of a match. Good news is that Sasha didn’t seem to kill herself so that is good. I would have liked for her to win at a PPV but I liked that she got her moment on the main event!
Your Winner and NEW WWE RAW Women’s Champion: Sasha Banks
Show Overall: God, I hated tonight. It wasn’t bad, I just really hated it. I hate the stupid stories, I hate the stupid matches just put together because why not. I hate the 50/50 booking. I hate random celebrity appearances that is only there to put down the talent, and get themselves over. I don’t care that Kevin and Jericho are heels I don’t appreciate hearing someone coming onto RAW to promote their shit, and just put them down and make fun of them for the sake of story. Where does Jericho, or Owens get a chance to get their heat back? Are they going to go onto their show on Netflix and give them a what for? Of course not! Anyways, the show was messy, and I am just tired of this never-changing attitude WWE gets into. Looking past the shit, having the women main event tonight’s show was a good call. This match should be treated like a big deal and it was. Also, the cruiserweight matches were awesome tonight and they were put into good spots to keep the crowd happy. So…
Until Next Time,
Monty the Yank